According to House, Wilson has had multiple affairs throughout his three marriages. Whether that is entirely true or not, Wilson has been engaged in a different kind of affair during the entirety of House, MD – an emotional affair with none other than House.
An emotional affair is “an affair excluding sexual intimacy but including emotional intimacy.” [1] No matter how one views the precise nature of Wilson and House's relationship, it is clearly very intimate and the most intimate one in either man's life. Their closeness is greater than that of a typical friendship, but they are not lovers; they are in the gray area of an emotional affair.
Wilson, from the few details given, has definitely engaged in at least one physical affair during his marriages. Wilson himself said he always told his wives about these affairs (206 – Spin), although there is ambiguity whether he includes this emotional affair, especially with his avoidance of gendered pronouns. And, oddly, Bonnie doesn't so much as suggest Wilson had been unfaithful during their marriage, but does take the time to tell House how he affected the marriage, speaking to him as if he were “the other woman” (320 – Housetraining).
Although the time line of the show is fuzzy, Wilson and House more than likely met while working at the hospital. Emotional affairs emerging between coworkers are typical, considering this guarantees they have common interests, and they see each other often during the day. [4] At this point, there is not necessarily any sexual attraction; it can simply be a perfectly healthy friendship.
The friendship then takes a turn when Wilson starts confiding in House details about his marriage and/or generally confiding in him more than in his wife. There does not even have to be any problems in Wilson's marriage at this point. [1] [4] Knowing House, he likely prodded Wilson for details, but nonetheless, Wilson gives them when he doesn't have to. Any personal information about his wife or the marriage Wilson may give is an automatic betrayal of trust, the main component that makes an affair so damaging. [2] [4]
Wilson also spends an unreasonable amount of time with House. During the series, he's been seen ditching Julie to spend Christmas with House (104 – Damned If You Do) and to meet House at a bar without being given a specific reason (122 – Honeymoon). Bonnie says to House, “You always needed him, and he was always there for you” (320 – Housetraining). From the way they frequently seek each other out during the day, it's safe to assume that this behavior was typical from Wilson throughout all of his marriages. (Which, of course, begs the question – if Wilson is always with House, when and how was he having all of these other supposed affairs?)
A person engaged an emotional affair longs for spending time with the friend while with one's spouse. [2] Wilson is never shown at home with his wife, but it's safe to say that not once during his marriage to Julie does he seem to look forward to seeing her. In fact, Wilson at times seems to downright forget about her.
Also, rather than being supportive of his friendship with House, Wilson's wives likely felt there was something strange about it – Bonnie's tone in her final scene with House indicates this, although she likely kept it to herself while married to Wilson (320 - Housetraining). And, according to Wilson, Julie hated House (107 - Fidelity); there are plenty of more obvious reasons to assume why this is (ie, House is a jerk), but since no specific reason is given, it's entirely possible she didn't like the relationship he had with her husband. If any of his wives ever breeched the issue, Wilson likely became uncomfortable or defensive, shutting down any possibility of conversation. [2] Wilson also could have omitted any mention of House when talking about his day to his wives, either because he knew they wouldn't want to hear about him, or because he knew he was doing something wrong. [1]
Wilson continues to be in denial about the effect his relationship with House had on his marriages. [1] He claims that, “My marriages were so crappy, I was spending all my time with you. Your real fear is me having a good relationship.” (305 – Fools For Love) But the Wilson presented to the audience during the first two seasons makes no apparent effort to work at his marriage, instead actively running to House every chance he gets; in fact, Wilson seems reluctant to start a new relationship, running away from Cuddy when he thinks she's showing interest in him (319 – Act Your Age).
Emotional affairs do not include sexual intimacy, but can possibly lead to it; in most of these affairs, there is a definite sexual attraction. [1] The friends may flirt with each other. [4] There is one instance that Wilson and House's conversation had a distinctively flirtatious air, and even the directing seemed to indicate this was the case:
House: Your lips say no, your shoes say yes.
[Camera cuts to Wilson's shoes and pans up his body.]
Wilson: Well they're French. You can't trust a word they say.
(107 – Fidelity)
“A partner may spend extra time getting ready before seeing this 'friend' or may buy new clothing or change their appearance in order to seem attractive to them.” [1] In the same episode, House notes Wilson has a new tie, in a color Julie hates, and says, “You want to look pretty. At work.” For the briefest moment, Wilson cracks a slight smile before looking away and telling House to stop and denying that he's having an affair.
In a few areas, Wilson's behavior doesn't quite align with that typical of an emotional affair. Although there is little overt indication either way, Wilson doesn't seem to have a problem telling his wives when he is spending time with House. But because he's never seen with his wife, it's entirely possible he might lie about or downplay the amount of time he spends with House.
Wilson has known House for at least ten years; House is not someone new he met and can easily idealize in contrast to a difficult in marriage. His relationship with House is actually the most stable one, while his wives come and go. Wilson's attraction to House is in no way superficial – note that even while living together, they sought each other's company at work.
Finally, the person engaged in an emotional affair doesn't usually feel guilt, thinking it's okay as long as no sex is involved. Wilson, throughout the course of the series, has repeatedly mentioned guilt and seems prone to it. Bonnie says to House, “James at least had the decency to feel guilty when he hurt me.” What is Wilson always feeling guilty about?
Season 4, however, has brought a noticeable shift in House and Wilson's relationship; one, among others, is Wilson referring to it as a “relationship” rather than a “friendship” (405 – Mirror, Mirror). They have been single at the same time for quite a while, after all...
Websites I Stole From
[1] http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Emotional_affair
[2] http://dating-advice.suite101.com/article.cfm/friendship_vs_emotional_affair
[3] http://dating.suite101.com/article.cfm/the_danger_of_emotional_affairs
[4] http://www.msnbc.msn.com/id/14287231
[5] http://community.livejournal.com/clinic_duty/
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And some more stuff I'd like to expand, but I've wasted enough time already...
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House's Sexual Attraction to Wilson
In contrast to Wilson, House exhibits overtly sexual behavior towards Wilson, while he's a little slower to admit to the emotional significance of their relationship. Casual viewers are fully aware of the sexual remarks House makes towards various women, but if one pays attention, it's obvious that House makes similar remarks to male characters (Chase, Cole, and the male CIA agent are a few), as well, particularly Wilson. The only logical assumption is that, yes, he is joking in both instances, but there's also underlying sexual attraction triggering him to say something in the first place.
Then people like me end up on the Wikipedia page for “booty call” by mistake: “In most instances, a booty call is made when the prospect of a traditional romantic date is highly unlikely, e.g., late in the evening, after midnight or in the pre-dawn hours), thus making it obvious that the intent of the call is for the sole purpose of obtaining and engaging in sexual intercourse.”
And then that reminds of this:
House: Wanna catch a movie?
Wilson: It's one in the morning.
House: I know a place. Although I wouldn't recommend wearing those shoes.
Wilson: [Changes topic.]
[321 – Family]
You have to wonder, what would House have done if Wilson took him up on the offer? (Maybe it would result in a very interesting game of Chicken...)
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The Case for Big Gay Wilson Continues
The Case for Big Gay Wilson continues to hold up so far this season, and that makes me immensely happy - well, except for the Wilson/Cuddy friendship thing. TPTB seem to want it, but can never keep it consistent.
Wilson's still a bit defensive - he had to check that no one was listening before he told House he was watching telenovelas (401 - Alone). Kind of odd, considering he had no problem insisting House was naked while on the phone, while a nurse was standing right there (406 - Whatever It Takes).
I also think Wilson made his first gay joke, ever, when he referenced Larry Craig and House in the same breath (407 - Ugly). Just...interesting.
Wilson's in a disgustingly good mood so far this season. Yeah, he's on the anti-depressants, but they don't work like that. He's...feeling good. Despite living in the hotel (cough metaphor for closet cough). Is he moving past Stage 4, Depression, to Stage 5, Acceptance?
On the meta front, RSL seems to be making some insinuations about Wilson in two separate interviews: "Yeah, not much with the ladies, uh, Wilson." "I don't think he can make things work with women [...] with women, he's hopeless." And he thinks Wilson watches the movie of the week on Lifetime and While You Were Sleeping. Um. Interesting.
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Season 4 Loves Slashers
Wilson is getting a lot more screen time (and I thought I was spoiled by Season 3!); he's also in more promos, especially leading up to Season 4, and for the first time he gets placed next to House in the group shots, and then there was even that Seventeen ad that was just the two of them. TPTB have something planned for Wilson.
Also, House/Cameron seems pretty done. Even though she had a bout of "I love Dr. House" in Ugly, they can't go anywhere with that (except in regards to her and Chase's relationship). Then [Spoiler] House and Cuddy sleep together, there's fall-out, that's it? Either TPTB are prepping House to start humping one of his fellows (OH SWEET JESUS NOT THIRTEEN, although I generally like her)...or Wilson.
Wilson gets the subplot in 409 from the way the summary is worded, but he's not in the promos. This actually gets my hopes up - the best reveals on the show have been the ones kept quiet or not mentioned at all.
And despite a lot people bitching House is being too straight or whatever, he's actually at his most rampantly bisexual this season; I feel like they're making House gayer, not straighter. I think the man's just horny, suddenly. Come on! Lap dances, two blowjob jokes, sexual harassment of his new, male fellows. There's a lot of gay going around; it's just not all directed towards Wilson. But it's there.
I'm not saying "OMG! Canon House/Wilson!" But something's definitely up.
Comments
I think that was meant to say 'women', but damn do I love it when slips like that happen :)
And now I'm picturing one of those documentaries on the discovery channel. XD
Your icon is very appropriate for this comment XD
Personally, I like the idea that two people (same sex) can be (very close) friends. Nothing more. For whatever reason. I don't care. I just like the interplay between the characters. Makes me watch.
This is just my opinion, so don't flame me or the person who owns this LJ please, but I like my ST completely U and not even close to R. I like to dream, even to write, but to see it on screen? No. I'll watch QAF if I want m/m stuff in (carefully edited) graphic detail.
And if *any* of the characters has ever experimented, sexually, illegal substances etc etc, it has to be House. Maybe in his youth. Maybe now. I like to dream. And that's all I like to do. Imagination's a wonderful thing...
That's nice. But...irrelevent. (And who's talking about "graphic detail"???) I watch Nip/Tuck and think Sean and Christian are just (very, very close) friends. I watch House, and happen to think there's something more going on between House and Wilson. I'll keep watching as long as they're friends, but that's my honest opinion.
*shrug*
QFT....IMHO. LOL
Wow, that was a lot of netspeak. But anyway, I'm totally on board with the emotional affair theory and it's long been my suspicion that there NEVER WAS any women at all.
However, I still have a hard time accepting the fact that they've stepped over that line while we weren't looking, if only for the rather selfish reason that we would have therefore missed the first tentative steps of a physical affair (I'm a sucker for first time fics...). If Wilson does indeed turn out to be living with House again, maybe I'll start to believe that. Maybe.
"There's a lot of gay going around" Oh, most definately! House and the CIA guy, Cole/Kutner, the lack of a buffer zone between Cole and Taub in the bathroom (just a funny notice, not necessarily gay). The writers seem to be opening up and realizing, "Hey! Our show is really gay."
LOL, yes! They probably looked at Nip/Tuck and thought, "How can gay can we make this before anyone notices?" XD
There are especially two things that has also caught my attention - Wilson says his marriages were so crappy, and he also refers to them (all 3) as being mistakes. Why? Why are they crappy? We're never told. It's not like they are doing something to him. More like he's just not getting the mental/emotional stimulation from them that he needs. He does, however, obviously get that from House.
And I always wondered why Bonnie doesn't say that Wilson's affair was what broke them up. She doesn't mention it at all, but on the other hand she mentions his devotion to House as a factor. That's very telling IMO. She does talk about it like she perceived Wilson's actions as being the affair, and I agree, an emotional affair is as much an affair as a sexual one, so she's probably right in her lament.
And I'm convinced that one of Wilson's wives have to have thought it was a strange friendship indeed, and called Wilson on it. I think you're right that Wilson would get defensive about it and just close up. But as you say, he does admit to having all these affairs, and specifically an affair while with Bonnie, so he must know how he feels. And you pointing out the guilt factor is very accurate. He obviously knows he's blown it big time.
Also, I always found it odd that he seems do be doing nothing whatsoever to solve his situations with his wives. We only see how he is while with Julie, but according to Bonnie it's been the same. Wilson neglecting dinners, Wilson running to House's beg and call, etc. And when Julie ends up having an affair, Wilson acts like it's his fault! And does NOTHING to try to work for his marriage. I always wondered why she has an affair AND kicks HIM out. Seems a little opposite, doesn't it? It would look like Wilson had already given up on the marriage at this point, and Julie having an affair really didn't affect him. Sure, he regrets that he fails at marriage, but not that he and Julie isn't an item anymore. Interesting.
Btw, RSL also says outright that Wilson is attracted to House. Not physically, but mentally, so there's really no doubt it is so.
There's another scene that's blatant flirting from House's part. It's from Daddy's Boy, where House is trying to make Wilson have dinner with him.
Wilson: You’re taking it back.
House: Moooom! How about we talk about this over dinner.
Wilson: Forget dinner, you're gonna kill yourself!
Chase: Nice bike!
House: Thank you. See that's how you do it, compliments, dinner.
Cameron: What do you do with your cane?
House: If he buys me dinner, he'll find out.
[some diagnostics dialogue until the ducklings leave]
House: You'd rather have dinner with your wife?
Wilson: Yes, I would. If she were speaking to me.
House: [smiles] Unlike her, I could make it worth your while. [leers]
Wilson: Fine.
And in Failure to Communicate House calls Wilson "honey." Neither of those times provoke a reaction. Apparently it's satisfying for Wilson to be the center of House's attention like this.
But isn't this odd - in s. 4 it's actually Wilson doing the flirting, and the gay jokes. He's mentioned House naked, made references to him jacking off, not once but twice (Whatever It Takes and Ugly), and made the obvious gay reference in Ugly by saying he was tapping his foot like that senator. It does seem like he's becoming far more outward with these things. As for him being gay, well, I'd say a repressed bisexual, but I certainly believe that his emotional affair could be a physical one, if either one pursued it.
That reminds me, when Wilson shows up at House's door in Sex Kills, he even says in so many words that he screwed up because he wasn't spending time with her. So Wilson knows what he's doing, knows he's screwing up big time again, but doesn't stop!
Apparently it's satisfying for Wilson to be the center of House's attention like this.
Wilson practically encouraged House to get jealous in Act Your Age (because...then what was the point of the "I had sex with Cuddy / No I didn't, hahahaha" thing?) They do seem to enjoy each other's bizarre attentions.
But isn't this odd - in s. 4 it's actually Wilson doing the flirting, and the gay jokes.
Now that you mention it, he has said more than the Larry Craig thing this season. That's a bigger leap from "WE'RE NOT TOGETHER" in S2 than I was thinking.
As for him being gay, well, I'd say a repressed bisexual
Hey, I consider Big Gay Wilson to cover bisexual Wilson! (Even though I think any attraction he may have toward women is negligible.)
As for House/Cameron, it doesn't seem that over and done with to me. It could develope in pretty much every direction, from abandoning the whole plot to humping. Okay, maybe not humping, but lots and lots of both of them having screen time together.
Living in a hotel is a metaphor for closet, and "it's personal!" means "I love you!".
What about horny Wilson and happy House? XD (Hell, I'll pay to see horny Wilson!)
As for House/Cameron, it doesn't seem that over and done with to me. It could develope in pretty much every direction, from abandoning the whole plot to humping. Okay, maybe not humping, but lots and lots of both of them having screen time together.
Well, they could do something with them, but I really doubt they will. As friends? Makes perfect sense; I always thought Cameron had great potential as a friend for House. I love Cameron this season, but I don't see how either character or the show would benefit from further House/Cameron storylines. (And I really do think the "we lied! Cameron is still pining for House" thing will end up being more about Cameron/Chase than Cameron/House).
Thanks for writing this! ^__^
LOL, thanks =)
I've been thinking for a while now that the only affair Wilson went through was an emotional one with House. ::nods::
I have been loving season 4 since the beginning! It's been so much fun. Wilson is happy and having lots of screen-time, numerous slashy moments for...well, all of the characters, actually. The writers seem to be having fun with it. :D
My metas are awesome? I feel loved =D
I've been thinking for a while now that the only affair Wilson went through was an emotional one with House.
And if Wilson did have any affairs, there definitely weren't as many as House makes it out to be. He's so paranoid XD
I have been loving season 4 since the beginning!
Me too! But then again, I'm one of the freaks that liked the pain and agony of S3...
I'm very disappointed by all this blatant buildup that seems to be leading nowhere.
spoiler:
Oh, love the meta by the way. ♥
I'm honestly curious, because a few people keep saying this, but why do they need to specifically and directly mention it again? And if they do, why does it have to be right away?
And that kind of sent me on a tangent that doesn't really have to do with your comment, but I'll put it here, anyway XD
A lot of fans seem to think that House and Wilson's relationship just "miraculously" healed, that Tritter was forgotten, and nothing changed...and I don't see that. Last season, House apologized to Wilson twice and thanked him a few times, and nothing big was made of it, or referenced later. Yeah, there was no big, deep discussion about the Tritter stuff (thank god, because that would be lame and OOC), but those actions definitely came as a result of that arc. And Wilson is aware of it - he accepts House's apologies, not because he lacks a backbone, but because he wants to encourage that behavior (if he had walked away, what message would that send to House?) - and his mood improves in the second half of the season up through now. Granted, I think something else is going on, as well, but the writing in this area has been consistent and subtle in my eyes.
...Like I said, tangent.
Spoiler:
Thank you for this well-worded meta. It strings everything together perfectly & makes me love House/Wilson even more than I already do because, whether the non-slashers like it or not, their "emotional affair," as you put it, is canon. You've proved it.
Also; is that spoiler really true? Haven't heard that one yet.
Aw, shucks...
whether the non-slashers like it or not, their "emotional affair," as you put it, is canon.
That's what I think, too. It's just there. Now, an eventual/current physical affair and various details may be from our fevered slasher imaginations, but I thought after Bonnie showed up, TPTB were really emphasizing their odd relationship. (It seriously shocked me when I read spoilers for that ep.)
Also; is that spoiler really true? Haven't heard that one yet.
It was mentioned right before S4 started, and hasn't been mentioned again for a while, so I was beginning to think I imagined it, but .
"And despite a lot people bitching House is being too straight or whatever, he's actually at his most rampantly bisexual this season; I feel like they're making House gayer, not straighter. I think the man's just horny, suddenly. Come on! Lap dances, two blowjob jokes, sexual harassment of his new, male fellows. There's a lot of gay going around; it's just not all directed towards Wilson. But it's there."
That's exactly what I've been noticing--sooo many sexual innuendos towards both men and women. I think Season 4, while maybe not the best in form, is definitely a slasher's heaven. I don't care what they do now, House will never appear even mildly straight to me again. Which makes me very, very happy.
Same here! I had my suspicions in past seasons, but now no one can convince me that House is not bisexual.
That makes me happy, too =D
As for House/Cameron-I wouldn't mind it if they were friends, I really wouldn't, it's just that I don't think they could ever really be friends because she would always want more and she would always care more about him than he about her, JMO. House/Wilson is so much more balanced, they both have a great affection for each other.
Anways, this is a truly fantastic analysis.
The whole "I love Dr. House" thing, while entertaining, was disappointing after she seemed to finally be over House. So you do, unfortunately, have a point. (And her scenes were House were actually cute this season! Please, TPTB, don't bring back creepy-obsessive!Cameron of S3.)
House/Wilson is so much more balanced, they both have a great affection for each other.
House and Wilson are like yin and yang. (Which reminds me of some other meta I wanted to write...)
[Camera cuts to Wilson's shoes and pans up his body.]
Wilson: Well they're French. You can't trust a word they say.
I just had to pop in and say 'BEST WILSON SCENE EVER.' Seriously.
He's very hot in that scene - I don't blame House for flirting with him XD
I agree with you thinking House really is bisexual. In the very least he has engaged in some form of sexual act with another man, at least once. He seems much too curious to not have tried it. Wilson I’m not as sure about. While your meta about Big Gay Wilson (which is excellent, btw) makes the theory of him being homosexual as good as canon, he seems to appreciate women a bit too much to be it. But what do I know, maybe he just admires beauty wherever it comes from, man or women, but really just goes for men. I’m actually don’t know what to believe there. *sheepish smile*
I can’t say very much about S4 since I haven’t seen any episodes from it yet (I’m just halfway through S3 right now) but I love spoilers so I’ve read everything that’s been posted on the community. SO from what I’ve seen, S4 seems lovely and almost overly slashy. But I’m not sure of what to think about this turn in the series. More H/W moments than ever before, House starting to become as content with his life as he can possibly be… That would mean that House MD is starting to near its end, right? If not something terrible will happen in the middle of S4 and House becomes miserable all over again. But we still have the progression of House and Wilson’s relationship. If they were to become canon during this season (which I’m not sure if I want them to or not – subtext is so fun!) and the series isn’t ending, it would probably mean that they would break up at some point, and that would kill the whole series. So, I’m a bit worried about that… But whatever, Wilson’s happy, which makes me happy. *g*
(Which, of course, begs the question – if Wilson is always with House, when and how was he having all of these other supposed affairs?)
Actually, it raises the question. To "beg the question" is to avoid the question or the issue instead of addressing it.
Sorry. AP Language last year made me a Logical-Fallacy Nazi.
But the linguistics nerd in me considers it right, since that's the more commonly understood and used meaning.
I read as many spoilers as I can find but have to admit I'm not particularly efficient at finding them.
But the one I read sounded less wishy-washy than that...
i may officially love you